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Parker/Denver Separation Attorney
Tom is a strong family man and he takes great pride in working with others who are committed to the health, welfare, and future of their loved ones. In a perfect world, families stay together forever. But, we don’t live in a perfect world.
As strange as it may sound, divorce is sometimes the wisest course of action for husbands and wives who want what is ultimately best for those closest to them. When the family unit no longer serves the best interests of its members, tough choices may be necessary.
Divorce is not just an easy answer for people who don’t want to work at a relationship. Good people, who have done everything in their power to improve their marriages, get divorced too. The world can be a very stressful and unforgiving place. Sometimes good people and their families must face the painful reality of divorce.
Feeling alone during this difficult time is normal. Feeling vulnerable during this time is also normal. But when you have Thomas A. Ramunda Jr. on your side, you are not alone. You need the help of a steady, experienced legal hand of a divorce attorney Denver residents trust. Whether he is helping you iron out minor domestic relations issues, assisting you with the difficult prospect of divorce, or battling against a serious attack on your family and your life, Tom is dedicated to helping you find solutions with care and compassion. Tom doesn’t ignore the personalities, emotions, expectations and fears that are involved in every domestic relations case. As a highly respected divorce attorney Denver trusts, he understands that your feelings are real and that you need an attorney who can help you successfully deal with the challenges you are facing.
Tom can help you understand all of the options available to you, advise you on the most prudent course of action relative to your goals, and navigate you through the often harsh and confusing legal system.
Tom firmly believes that not all divorces have to be contentious. In a recent interview about how he achieves such successful outcomes in his divorce cases, Tom stated, “My goal is not to stick my nose in these divorces and muck them up. I will help keep things as simple as possible for those who are able to be reasonable and civilized with each other.” As a divorce attorney Denver can turn to, he is empowered to use new settlement techniques to help avoid a combative atmosphere if both spouses are willing. These techniques are deliberately designed to create a non-hostile environment, in which excessive fees and ongoing heartache can be spared.
If a more aggressive approach is necessary in your case, Tom is ready and willing to lead the way. Unfortunately, you can’t control the other side and, when confronted with unreasonable opposition, it is essential to have someone like Tom, with years of trial experience and with savvy courtroom skills to protect you and your children. Tom is not intimidated by strong opposition. He will zealously fight for you and for the best interest of your family.
Tom is ready to navigate you through the many stages of separation and divorce, from the initial stage of deciding to end a marriage to the closing stage of obtaining final orders. With Tom as your attorney, you have a wise and strong advocate by your side. During this difficult time, Tom’s help can make all the difference.
Infidelity, Sexism and How Divorce Happened in the Recent Past
Monogamous marriages are plagued by infidelity, otherwise known colloquially as cheating. Cheating can take a variety of forms, so in some marriages having an emotional affair with someone is just as serious as stepping out sexually on your partner. Depending on your religion, upbringing, personal cultural values, and societal norms cheating can end a marriage completely with no chance of reconciliation.
High profile cases of infidelity touch all areas of our lives, from celebrities to politicians, influencing our negative opinions of the neighbor next door’s story of how his wife abandoned him and the children for another man. However, our society is far more lenient towards cheating of both sexes then adultery laws have been historically.
The majority of past and current American laws concerning infidelity can be traced back to heavily conservative Christian principles. Unfortunately, the interpretations of the Bible and of subsequent laws are heavily skewed in favor of men, with harsher sentences for wives for the same crimes as their husbands. Wives have often, religious undertones notwithstanding, been viewed as a man’s property for as long as history has been recorded.
We are going to look briefly at how the 1950s, 1960s, and 1970s shaped modern adultery laws, and the infidelity situations that affected couples, especially the women of the times.
Infidelity in the 50s, 60s, and 70s
The stereotypical 1950s and 1960s wife was one of a frilly white apron-wearing woman surrounded by lots of cheeky, smiling children and the husband with the black attaché case almost out the door to work. This magical world where no marital problems existed was one every husband and wife were meant to strive for, marital problems existed then as they do now. However, legal justifications for divorce were entirely fault based: one spouse had to prove spousal wrongdoing, typically evidence of cheating.
For various reasons, both sexes were more empowered than they had ever been before, which lead to cheating from both partners. Men had the upper hand: typically, better educated and with access to more resources, a man could accuse his wife of unfaithfulness and get a divorce easier then she could. The result, although negative for the man was devastating for the woman: she could be seen as a failure, and as a divorcee could have had a harder time finding employment if she had marketable skills. Seen by most Churches as negative to both spouses, men were usually more welcome to return after a brief separation than women were.
The need to prove spousal wrongdoing changed when the Governor of California Ronald Reagan (yes, President Reagan) signed the first no-fault divorce law in 1969. Now, couples could divorce for any reason. Don’t like your husband buying that new car with consulting you? Divorce him! Don’t like your wives constant nagging about finances? Divorce her and marry your mistress!
Truly revolutionary for the times, the no-fault law spread across most U.S states. Infidelity rarely had to be demonstrated, and the American attitudes (although even in 2017 attitudes are still evolving) towards divorce were no longer so cut and dry. A woman could divorce her husband, retain possession of the house and car, and maintain her reputation enough to get a good paying job.
Current Infidelity Laws in Colorado and Other States
How does the twenty or so years from the 1950s-1970s affect your pending divorce?
Although no-fault laws were introduced in most states, older laws are still on the books. Some laws are extremely outdated and are not (generally) upheld, but there are cases of obscure laws being brought into divorce proceedings that entirely changed the outcome of a case. These laws are extremely strict concerning any number of issues, such as cheating, fornication, desertion, abandonment, etc. For example, if you cheat on your spouse in Utah, you can face imprisonment up to three years. In Arizona adultery is a class 3 misdemeanor and it is not “cheating” but fornication, which has a different definition depending on the state.
Here in Colorado adultery laws were abolished in 2013. The law read that adultery was defined by “sexual intercourse by a married person other than with that person’s spouse…” and was illegal.
Now it is simply an example of marital misconduct. Colorado is among few states where there is at least approximal gender equality because it does not matter if it is the husband or wife who wants the divorce. As a no-fault state, cheating cannot be brought before the court as a means of getting a divorce granted.
However, please note that gender equality does not just apply to a women’s status in a divorce either. Although history has favored men over women, the 1970s to current revolutions in thinking demonstrates that, especially in making laws fairer, men are getting better representation in the courtroom. The complete role reversal from housewife to CEO does not always translate well in custody battles where the man can be unfairly represented if he is the primary caregiver.
The evolution from the 1950s, 1960s and 1970s divorce laws concerning infidelity to modern times was a long process that revolutionized our society. But, interpretation of any law is best left to the professionals: just because Colorado is a no-fault state does not mean you don’t need the best possible legal counsel. Contact us today so we can make help you make sense of your divorce.
We handle all family law matters including:
- Divorce & Separation
- Child Custody & Child Support
- Child Visitation
- Division of Finances & Property
- Support, Alimony & Maintenance
- Restraining Orders and Protection Orders
- Post-Decree Modifications
- Grandparent Rights
- Father’s Rights
For a free consultation on these and other legal matters, send us a message, or call us at 303-840-2700 today.